Getting old

I sat at my computer today to write. Something had happened earlier, and The Husband said: ‘That would be a good thing for you to write about’, but do you think we can remember what it was? We sat there and both tried to remember our conversations through the day, but the elusive memory slipped past us both.

Memory is a funny thing

I remember to write a shopping list, then forget to take it with me. I thought, aha! I can fix this and started putting my list on an app on my phone, which is great until I forget to put the phone in my bag. I call them memory leaks – they are there one minute, and gone the next, drowned in the flotsam and jetsam of my brain until they bubble to the surface, usually too late.

Often I talk of someone that I know really well, and when recalling the conversation with them to someone else, find their name has become a memory leak, gone into my brain where all sorts of useless things get stored, reminiscent of mismatched socks, or odd quotes my mother used to say that nobody else has ever heard of. ‘You could ride to London on that and not cut yourself’, in reference to a blunt knife. Oh yes, I can remember that alright.

When to worry about forgetfulness

After age 50, it's quite common to have trouble remembering the names of people, places, and things quickly, as like other bits of your body, the brain starts to wear out too.

There’s a test to see how you are doing, where a person is given five words to remember and then asked to recall them after a short break. It's often used by doctors to help identify memory issues like dementia, Alzheimer's disease or mild cognitive impairment. (Hmm, sounds like me trying to remember my shopping list).

We’ve all been there. You know what you want to say, but can’t remember the word. You forget the name of a favourite movie. You’re about to leave for an appointment, but you can’t find your car keys or phone.

Distraction or Forgetfulness

Frequent forgetfulness or memory lapses often leave people worrying about dementia or other progressive conditions. But that’s not always the case. To me, forgetting why you walked into a room is easily dismissed, as I would probably have been distracted. Went to get a can of beans for instance, then got distracted by picking up a fallen tea towel and then deciding it needed to go in the wash, taking it into the bathroom to put in the linen basket, and distracted again by remembering the soap dispenser needed topping up, something I forgot to do when I noticed it earlier…….and so it goes on.

I have previous for losing things

I obviously have a history of losing things. I remember years ago helping out at an old people’s home and volunteered to take four old ladies out one morning for a little shopping trip. I thought it would be nice to leave them in town for an hour or so, and arranged to meet them for coffee before we returned. Only two of them turned up - and I was faced with the dilemma of going to look for the missing ones, and risking the ones that had shown up wandering off, or being embarrassed at returning with half my charges missing, sparking an all-out search party. Thankfully the absentees turned up, and I wasn’t barred from the home for carelessness.

Having difficulty recalling the name of someone you just met or having a word on the tip of your tongue that later comes to you is typically not concerning so they say but, if memory loss starts to affect daily functioning – for example, missing appointments or forgetting to take medications – further evaluation might be recommended.

I am actually looking forward to losing the memory for good. It won’t matter then if I can’t remember where I was going, or if I go out in odd shoes - so long as they both fit on the right feet.

Marilyn writes regularly for The Portugal News, and has lived in the Algarve for some years. A dog-lover, she has lived in Ireland, UK, Bermuda and the Isle of Man. 

Marilyn Sheridan